HW#59-SOF Prom 2011 & DSPs

When i first got to prom, i noticed most of the girl's appearances rather than the boys. Most of all the girls there had on beautiful gowns with their hair looking perfect and make-up on their face to glow. There was a transformation it definetly felt like "magic". I cried a little bit just seeing everyone. Everybody looked their best and you noticed everything. The people in school who are considered not so popular or just the quiet ones were the loud ones at the prom that made a statement. I noticed that everybody came together as one no matter what happen during the school year because usually in movies and things everybody seem to have their own clique but at the prom is wasnt like that at all.

The prom was definetly like the movies to the extend that people were drinking and kind of wasted that night. People made it a point to get messed up because it was "prom". It was very typical night of prom but everybody added their own into it. Once prom was over everybody kind of transformed into a different person. I know i did. It was like prom is over, now it's time to really party. Everybody changed from their gowns to their party wear to have prom pt.2. Having the discussion in class, i thought that i would be more aware of my surrounding of prom but i actually forgot all about. I feel like prom is such a social norm to teenagers, there isn't much to think about it. Overall the prom was a very unforgettable event and i have a great time with the class of 2011.

HW#58 - Prom Interviews

My friend Kimberly (hasn't attended Prom)

1.)What are your int ital thoughts on prom?
I think its more of a girls day too get all dolled up too show their friends the ending and how much they grew up as years passed on. I think its just one big event too end the year with people you've known throughout high school.

2.)Are you excited for prom? Why or why not?
Not really. I think its too stressful and cost too much just for one night. And i just feel like my grade isn't as close as we all should be.

3.)Are you going with someone?
Most likely yes because i want too experience the day with someone who will remember every moment of that day.

4.)Do you think it's mandatory for someone to get that prom "experience"?
I don't think it is. I think that each high school student is different in how they interact with people. So depending on how they're socially they might not like it, might not be life changing too them.

5.)What's your opinion on the general stereo-types revolved around prom ?
In movies prom is this romantic place where everyone goes with their boyfriend/girlfriend. Usually in movies at the end of that night the two love birds have some sexual contact. Or even that every ones happy during this whole process

6.)Do you think it's one of the most important times of your life?
I don't. I think graduating and getting accepted into a college is the most important. Because a girl or boy can be doing so bad in school and go to prom without getting the chance too have that final walk down.

My Friend Katherine (attended Prom last week)

1.)What are your initital thoughts on prom?
Being that I went to prom, I think that it was a fun experience for me. I was able to hang out with my close friends who probably I wouldn't see once we graduated.

2.)Are you excited for prom? Why or why not?
At the time when I went I was reallllyyyy excited just by the fact of putting on a gown and dressing up. It's like a good feeling inside for a girl's point of view.

3.)Are you going with someone?
I went with my ex boyfriend at the time. Me and him are really cool now. If you are seeing someone at the time like a gf/bf it's only right you go with them.

4.)Do you think it's mandatory for someone to get that prom "experience"?
Personally I don't think it's mandatory but seniors should go to prom. It's like that one night when all you guys we be all together as a group to just bug out and have a lot of fun. So I don't think it's mandatory but I would push people for it.

5.)What's your opinion on the general stero-types revolved around prom ?
Usually you always hear that you are suppose to have sex with someone and drink because it's a "special" night so you are free to do whatever you want. I know when I was at prom people were hooking up with people you wouldn't even think of which was weird and awkward.

6.)Do you think it's one of the most important times of your life?
Honestly, I think that it is a important time of your life but at the same time if you don't wanna go you shouldn't force yourself because everybody is going. I'm kind of on the fence. Prom is a big deal to some people like before your wedding type of event.

My Aunt

1.)What are initital thoughts on prom?
I think that prom is an exciting event for every teenager. It is a way for them to grow and for the parents to see their child and be like "omg look at my little boy/girl"

2.)Are you excited for prom? Why or why not?
Years ago when i went to prom, i was excited but not over the top. It wasn't something i was dreading on or anything. Just a party for me to enjoy myself with my friends.

3.)Are you going with someone?

No i actually just went with a group of friends in a limo.

4.)Do you think it's mandatory for someone to get that prom "experience"?

I don't think so. I think you either go or you don't. It's a big deal to other, some not so much.

5.)What's your opinion on the general stereo-types revolved around prom ?

I think that its kind of funny how we have all these different kind of ideas of what "prom" is but what is it really? Everybody has their own interpretation of prom. It wont all be the same concept.

From the people i interviewed i noticed that all of them said that it is a day for girls to get all dressed and be beautiful not that they aren't already and have a good time. They all mentioned that prom is the kind of thing that isn't the kind of thing you have to go to, that it's your own voice. All the people i did interview were girls also so maybe that has something to do with it. I think that if i had interviewed a boy it would have been a little different because i think prom isn't a big deal as it is with boys as with girls. They don't have to prepare as much as we do. They all mentioned the fact that they are are/were excited for prom that it was/would be a good time for everybody.

HW#57 - Initial Thoughts on Prom

Growing up i think that prom is one of things that a little girl couldn't wait for besides her wedding. When i think of prom i think of the gliss and glam. The fact you get to dress up for that one special event and feel like a princess. There is always a method when it comes to prom the girls are suppose to go all out from head to toe just to feel nice for that one occasion. It starts from the guy asking you and then all the planning comes along with it. It's not a one, two, three step process, it's the kind of thing that takes time. You can rush perfection especially in a girl's point of view. Prom is the right of passage to adult hood. It's a event like that this that allows you to be free and kind of do whatever you want.

When you think of Prom, you think of partying and having the time of your life. Lots of people say that if you miss out on prom that you will regret in later on in your life. I don't think so personally. I feel like sometimes prom is overrated sometimes because you don't need to follow the social norm. Why is that you should bring a date to your prom rather than alone? Prom i think is kind of an excuse also to drink and act reckless because its "that night" to do what you please. Young teens are suppose to lose their virginity and do the unthinkable. Even though prom is pretty much the same i think depending on where you love it is slightly different. Overall i think that prom is just want you make it, if you want to go you should. If not, do whatever fits you. Some people make a seem like it's a mandatory thing when it's not.

Questions:
Where did the Prom ritual come from?
Why do we treat Prom as a mini wedding?
What would it be like if Proms never existed?
Do other countries have Prom?

HW#56 - Culminating Project Comments

Comments To:

http://sarahfrancesca23.blogspot.com/
Sarah,

I thought that your video was very creative and enjoyable. It caught my attention right away. I liked how you explained that we aren't full control of our bodies mentally but physically. It's interesting how even after this unit you still aren't sure what you want to be done physically to your body after hearing all of those alternatives. I liked the fact the people who you interviewed actually took the time and thought about what they wanted done to their body not just bubbles ideas. You did a good job. Keep it up!

http://rossi63blog.blogspot.com/
Rossi,

I thought that your post was intriguing. I thought it was weird how the woman was against home funeral because of the constant reminder that she had a dead loved one in her house, i think that is the best part of a home funeral. It's nice that you had a fun time while doing this project which makes it more engaging. It's funny how the woman buys funeral magazines, i never heard of that before. Good Job!

http://ineedablogforandysclass.blogspot.com/
David,

I liked your post because after doing this project i was thinking about a home burial for myself. It's interesting how in New York where we have everything there are so many restrictions to having a home burial. The only thing i would say is that i can't see the video which i thought would be good to have a better outlook on the points you were making. Overall i thought it was nice and interesting. I now know what i can do farther in order to have a home burial. Nice job!

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Comments For Me:

Lina

First off, I really like how you tied this into your last project for the Birth Unit. Many people agree that death and life are highly relative and yet, so many people don't like speaking or witnessing death rituals. That idea that you've followed in discussing this seems to follow along with the idea of the course very nicely.

Also, in class, you said that "money doesn't matter" in terms of the funeral and here you said that a family uses their own materials. From this I gather that it's safe to assume that a family doesn't feel the pressure to buy or create some standard, fantastic coffin/casket for the decease to outdo everyone else. Interesting.

Sarah

I really was interested by the information you provided in this blog post. It seems as though the way Indian people deal with death is much more personal. I found it fascinating that young children and saints are buried because they are pure. This part really caught my attention, "Unlike our social dominant practices it doesn't seem that money is an issue in India. Everything done during in the ceremony there isn't a money factor that causes the family to have to worry about things. Its all religion based." In our culture a lot of people associate death with religion. However, do you think in our culture religion is a reason to raise the price? Or do you think there is no comparison between India and the United States, since our country is extremely wealthy? Good job!

Ally

I loved this, I was actually really interested in the topic you chose to do your project on. I think that the Hindu culture focuses more on the morning and celebration of the deceased life rather than appearance of the burial ground and or cost. I thought it was interesting that they crack the skull in order to release the soul from the body , even though it seems a little gore-ish it makes sense. Its almost as if a person's soul is trapped in the vessel(they're body) once they die so they need to be released. Religion really plays a huge role in the Hindu culture and its shown by they're social dominant practices.
"In the Hindu culture, they will bring their sick loved ones home with them to die peacefully instead of hospitals. It is Hindu custom for the family to build a shelter and perform a fire ritual (homa) in order to bless nine brass pots and one clay pot. In absence of a shelter a fire is made at home. Relating back to the cremation only men can attend it, women are forbidden."
They're social dominant practice with funerals seems to be a home funeral, which seems far fetched in the states and most people don't know about them.

Willie

I liked your project because when you were taling about hinduism, I also did a little research in the topic which made me very interested because i found a little bit of information but too hear more stuff on it was a big help also to my prject

David

I really liked how for the project you do focused on India again to give more information on the same place after the last presentation you gave on birth. Since you focused on birth before (the start) and now death (the end) it just all fits in very well for your project. I found it interesting that after a funeral of a loved one they wouldn't eat certain foods and mourn for 13 days (which in America is a bad luck number). I also found it interestuing that in India the burials contain somewhat of a Home Funeral and a Cremation.

COTD2-Harold and Maude Movie

In the beginning of the movie, Harold was playing dead and his mother didn't even care. She completely ignored him. It seemed like he is obsessed death. Harold like to play with death and make up different scenes in front of him mother. It looks like deep down inside he wants to die but he still is alive. Harold is very nonchalant about death and i don't think have any feelings toward it. It doesn't take it seriously. The mother kind of gets upset by the fact that he always does things to make him seem dead. Every time that he plays the different roles he never get a reaction from his mother that he wants. I think that overall he is ignored by his family so he does things to get attention.

Maude and Harold are similar in the way that they are obsessed with death. She is always attending funerals and burials of other people she doesn't know. Later on in the scenes, he rather be alone than with a girlfriend. His mother tries to put him on a date and he just scared her away. Nobody really understands him as a person besides his mother. Maude and Harold both have unique personalities that allow them to get along. I think that Maude believes that everybody dies and you should live your life to have fun. She always stealing people's cars and doing what she wants to live her life to fullest who cares about rules and the regulations.

I think that Maude teaches Harold to let go and enjoy himself because he's so stuck in dying and doing different roles to kill himself, instead of the moment you should live it. Harold mother i think believes that Harold should act age appropriate. The mother doesn't really take death seriously as Harold and Maude do. She doesn't believe in the deeper meaning of it. She is opposite of Harold. She is very materialistic as well. Maude says "the earth is my body, my head is in the stars", i think that she means that we rule the world that you own your body and you wish what ever happens to your body or do what you want. She is very full of life and doesn't think of the bad possibilities just the good ones.

In the movie he said "I haven't lived. I've died a few times". He was saying that he enjoyed being died. He would rather be dead than alive and that is when Maude comes in to brighten up his life because of the negativity he always puts on himself. I think that he doesn't receive enough love or attention from her. There is more to life than dying that is what Maude is trying to teach Harold.

HW#55 - Culminating Project - Care of the Dead

From the birth unit,i was curious to find out about the birth rituals in India which i found intriguing, so i decide to look in the death rituals in India as well to compare and contrast them as well. In the United States we do the dominant social practices such as cremation and funeral burials. The cremation rate in the U.S is about 37% and the cremation rates in India are 48%. The way that India care for the dead is much different than our typical funeral burial. In the culture of Hinduism, most of the body are cremation that is why the percentage is much higher the U.S. Young children and saints are buried because they are considered pure. They believe that cremation allows the body to leave the body and move unto the next chapter in life. These rituals happen most of time either dusk or dawn. When these cremations are happen they usually happen around the time after the death or as soon as possible.

The process of the funeral ritual is called Antyeshti. After the death/funeral of their loved one, they mourn for another thirteen days. In the process of mourning the family not considered pure. They do not eat certain foods and attend certain religion occasions. In the shraddha ceremony, is a ceremony specifically for male only. " It is intended to nourish, protect, and support the spirits of the dead in their pilgrimage from the lower to higher realms, preceding their reincarnation and reappearance on Earth."

The main part of the ceremony is when they bath the body,dressed in fresh cloth, and bedecked with flowers. This reminds me of the home funerals that we saw in the movie because every person that we saw being buried the family members had dressed them and put lots of flowers around in their casket. After fixing their physical appearances, the Hindus put drops of Ganges water in the person's mouth which comes from the river. They then carry the body to where it will be cremated by doing call and response chanting and singing. The eldest son of the family or oldest child then lights the funeral pyre where the body is burned. To renounce their life it is important to crack the skull so that the soul can move on to the next life. At the end of the ceremony a priest or family member recite something from the scripture in memory of the person who is deceased. ""As a person puts on new garments, giving up old ones, the soul similarly accepts new material bodies, giving up the old and useless ones."After three days have passed the eldest son then picks up the ashes and puts them into the Gange river or any other sacred river.

The 3rd, 5th, 7th or 9th day after the death of the person are important, as all relatives gather to have a meal of the decease's favorite foods. A small amount of the food is offered before their photo and later, it is ceremonially left at an abandoned place, along with a lit diya. The overall message of their ceremony is to show reverence to a deceased person. The death rituals have been increasing from the last year.

In the Hindu culture, they will bring their sick loved ones home with them to die peacefully instead of hospitals. It is Hindu custom for the family to build a shelter and perform a fire ritual (homa) in order to bless nine brass pots and one clay pot. In absence of a shelter a fire is made at home. Relating back to the cremation only men can attend it, women are forbidded.

Unlike our social dominant practices it doesn't seem that money is an issue in India. Everything done during in the ceremony there isn't a money factor that causes the family to have to worry about things. Its all religion based. In the U.S, families are always worried about how much they could afford to pay for a casket for it to be nice and affordable. Caskets, funerals, burials, etc are very expensive where we come from. In India they use their own products and materials to create their own funeral burials.

http://hinduism.iskcon.com/practice/604.htm

http://www.iloveindia.com/indian-traditions/funeral-traditions.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pyre

http://www.funeralwise.com/customs/hindu

http://www.funeralwise.com/customs/hindu/beliefs

HW#54 - Independent Research B

Growing up in a puerto-rican family, it is very traditional to be catholic and follow all the rules of being baptized for original sin, getting your communion done, and confirmation the main steps of being catholic. As well of all these things is that my family and i believe in heaven and hell and depending your behavior on earth will determine your destination in the afterlife. Reading Luke 14, it relates a lot to my religious background. Jesus was stating that if you give or help someone in need then in contrast you will be rewarded. It says "if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. 13 But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, 14 and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.” " If you do good for others in your life then you will go to heaven. It is all about giving back to others and being kind to go to the right place in life living well.

Reading Matthew 5-6, is the same kind of concept that behaving well on earth is the way to life. Also no matter where you come from, there is a place for you in the afterlife. You should always turn the cheek to the person who tries to put you down, in the long run when death comes upon you, you will be free. “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you." In the catholic culture is it believe that most of the time if you do good in life, then you will succeed later on in heaven. If you betray jesus or do wrong in life then will be sent to hell.

HW#53 - Independent Research A

Dance, Laugh, Drink. Save the Date: It’s a Ghanaian Funeral. By:Sam Dolnick

Death is being symbolized as a happy moment in life. In the Ghanaian culture they have a big party or celebration for the death of their loved ones. Instead of crying why don't we rejoice this moment in life? They raise money to help out with funeral expenses and overall have a good time.

In the Ghanaian culture they don't see death as a bad thing. They want to spend the time laughing enjoying life like we should. The funerals are portrayed as parties for their culture unlike the social dominant practices we usually are known for. We have sad and people crying at funerals while the Ghanaian are celebrating this death. It said "The parties are a direct import from Ghana, where funerals are world-renowned for their size and extravagance. Coffins there sometimes resemble Mardi Gras floats; an athlete’s might be shaped like a soccer ball, a fisherman’s, like a canoe". This isn't your typical funeral. Different countries take death in many different ways.

The Empty Chair in the Dining Room by Patrick Egan

They talk about death more in the senior housing facilities so they become more comfortable with dying because of their age. They have become less terrified and more accepting to dying.

I find it interesting by the fact they have “Dearly Departed” table where there is a person picture there of who died. The people at the senior homes are being able to cope with their turn of death knowing that it will be coming soon. I believe that since the reason the older people are placed there that is why they bring up death so much. “It helps move away from the notion that these places are just warehouses for the elderly,” said Dr. Schumacher. “It’s a community, and the residents contribute in a lot of ways.” Referring the book that i read "The Curtains" it said that society believes in life after death which kind of reminds me of this article because the people at the homes put so much emphasis on comforting the elderly so they can die happy or not terffied.

As Facebook Users Die, Ghosts Reach Out by Jenna Wortman

Not only does death take place right in front of us but also facebook. People are being allowed to have tribute pages to others who have passed away and to take that person alive even though they are dead. It is kind of like an "afterlife" in the virtual world.

Looking at all three texts, they have all provide a way to grief with death. Facebook has provide a way to keep people alive by having deceased person be recongized for their acknowlegement even though they have passed. It allows other people who have know them to cope with their feelings and see their face everyday with the memories that they have cherished. "But death, of course, is unavoidable, and so Facebook must find a way to integrate it into the social experience online." We as a society i feel make things bigger than what they are already are to have this importance in life if its either death, birth, or afterlife.

HW#52 - Third Third of the COTD Book

Precis

What happens after you died? Is there any life there? Society has been altering the whole life after death situation. We want this as a "forever" thing that is why funeral homes and other death related concepts keep the traditional going. Change how people understand death. Like religion used to do.

Quotes

The point of Fernwood is fantasy, a dream of pushing up giant redwoods from below, feeding them with your own hard-won carbon atoms, the afterlife as compost.

If people will pay a million dollars to be buried in a family mausoleum what will they pay to be buried under a three-hundred-year-old oak tree?

The reason funeral homes cant make a connection with their community is not that the community is scared to talk about death, it's that the funeral home is scared to talk about death. That's why funeral homes embalm people, put make-up on them and pretend they're alive. Here we're very realistic. Dead people should look dead.

Death and destruction made more life possible.

The idea of forever works as a sales tool, but in reality, of course, it's a myth.

I think the funeral industry is ahead of the curve, they're at the level of Disney.

Analysis

After reading the book Curtains, i see death is many different ways now other than the mindset i already had on two things. Everybody wants to believe that there is life after death but we never really knows what happens. I think that one of the reason we go all out for funerals and such things because we believe that there is something besides the human life to prepare us in the after life. This relates back to the birth unit becuase we grew up with all these social norms on how the baby should be born it was c-sections vs. natural and hospital vs. home births. In the death unit it was burying someone vs. cremation and then everything else in between. Both of the units display the the existent of permanence.

HW#51 - Second Third of COTD Book

Precis

I have learned that the undertakers take the dead very seriously. The deceased are being well respect and treated as if they are alive. Everybody has their own conclusion to their death meaning having funerals or cremation. The people working in the business have these different roles in which they play to deal with the affliciton with death. Also we had build a certain wall that with these social norms of dominant practice religion also plays a role as well. The dead is very much respected and worried.

Quotes

1.)Funeral director fatigue syndrome:
Exhaustion and loss of energy
Irritability and impatience
Cynicism and detachment
Feeling of omnipotence and indispensability

2.)We're trained to take care of the body, not sell the product.

3.)We do this for the families, we treat the dead like we'd treat our own fathers and aunts, each ease handled with respect and dignity

4.)The idea that dead bodies, unless they're embalmed or shrink wrapped, pose a health risk is undertaker propaganda Finally, please write an analytical paragraph that BOTH says something either funny or sad about the text AND demonstrates that you really read it and thought about it.

Analytical

While I was reading one part that I found kind of funny was when the narrator and another worker were in a preparation room basically disinfecting the body while listening to music and the woman was having fun doing her job. I thought it was weird but funny. You don't usually people cutting up bodies, taking out organs and what-not while blasting music and lip-syncing the lyrics. It's unheard of to me. The narrator was very new to this environment which I also that was humorous because he didn't know how to react to the situation. There was one part where Neil and his wife were actually dancing during a funeral session that was funny. Since they experience death everyday they just detach themselves and do what they can do to stay happy. It's too natural for them I think.

HW#49 - Comments on Best of Your Break HW

For Bianca,

I thought that you post pulled me in a lot. I liked how you talked about the differences you sister had about cremation to you mother. The lines that stood out to were "cremation doesn’t need to be looked at negatively because “to some people, the body is materialistic while the soul is the essence of the body…Any way of disposing of the dead can be considered a human intervention if someone looks at the way to care for the dead in a way that does not manifest love.” I never thought cremation was considered negativity until i heard you mother's perpective of being as one/whole. I never really thought of it like that. The fact that you mention you didn't want to relive the past but being able to gain insight on the caring of the dead was pretty cool. I feel the same way, you never want to relive the past of deceased people. Overall i thought you post was written well. There weren't any mistakes that i found. Keep it Bianca. I really enjoy reading your post and im not just saying that. :)

For Abdul,

I enjoyed reading your post. One of your questions that i found interesting was "Is it more socially acceptable to have a funeral burial or be cremated, and is that an alternative to the dominant social practices?" I was thinking the same way also how do people in other countries deal with the care of the dead. One of the lines that stood out to me was when you said "My Uncle from my mom's side had just had us go to his house about a month or two before his death so we could help him "clean up" because lots of times when we are young we aren't always told the exact true about death because of our age and how we do not percieve it as children. Just like you i was taught to respect the dead. It's funny how you mention that because if we didn't it's kind of like we have consequences of doing so. I thought that all you questions were well thought out and i hope to find the answers to them as well. Good Job!

Leah
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Leah,
I wish I could express more empathy with this post but, I have not had as many care of the dead experiences as you have had. Nonetheless, I admire your courage to describe how you felt while looking at your grandfather's dead body in line 9 of paragraph 1, "Looking at him in the coffin was so unnatural just by the fact it wasn't 'him'. When I visited him in the hospital and saw his body there, it was completely different seeing him all dressed up." I would've have liked your writing much more if you had defined what unnatural was and gave your reasoning for putting the word him in quotation marks. Why was the dead body no longer the the person you once you knew? This is an important question to ask because it puts the reader in perspective on terms of the definitions you establish, which will make your thoughts more concise.

In light of other aspects of your posts, I like the fact that you bring up several interesting questions. However, instead of listing one after another, spend some time focusing on one specific question so your thoughts are more insights than bubbles.

One thing that I must stress is Proofreading. Proofreading will do wonders to writing. Little grammatical errors will do no justice to your writing so, please watch out for those small errors (i.e. basic punctuation, spelling mistakes, and incorrect noun usage) - Clarify who you are talking about in each sentence, "then"is vague when a group of people is not mentioned before the "then." Also, work on your transitions so your writing is more coherent.

Nice work. I hope that you take my feedback to heart and I'll be glad to read your future posts.

Bianca

Leah,

Your most beautiful line was, " Looking at him in the coffin was so unnatural just by the fact it wasn't "him." I know exactly how you feel due to personal experience, I know the undertakes and funeral home people try and do their best to make the dead look as 'alive' as possible, but frankly they just don't get the job done. The lipstick, no movements, the way the skin feels is all so fake. Your post brought up several interesting points and questions which I enjoyed.

As far as improvement goes you definitely should consider proofreading more. It really can make a difference. You should try doing you blog assignments in a word document since their spell check is much better and they catch more things than blogger does.

I will be reading you blogs a lot so I will know if you didn't take my advice seriously. Good job and take advantage of the feedback.

Abdul

HW#50 - First Third of Care-of-the-Dead Book Post

Precis
I am working as a paid trainee at Neil Bardal's Funeral home. I got a tour of the cremation center. I learned the different parts and the process of being turned from a human into a complete ash. I met all my co-workers and the roles that they play at the funeral home.

Quotes
*Humans are the only creatures who know they're going to die, and even worse, they know they know it, and it's not something they can "unknow".

*This whole place is built like a theatre; a public space up front with its living room set, and a backstage where all the magic happens.

*Every former soul that comes in through the garage door is assigned a number; it's written in Sharpie on their cardboard box and the corpse's wristband , not unlike the wristbands they issue at raves and folks festivals.

*Neil Bardal says we need the ritual to know the person who's died. We need to see the body, we want the proof; we're empirical, modern, enlightened souls who benefit from looking at death when it comes, standing up to sing and pray in its presence.

*the dead are uncooperative, but they respond to gravity and brute force, a kind of mortuary tough-love.

Analytical Paragraph

After reading the first 1/3 of the book. I first thought it wasnt going to be interesting but it actually was. The main idea of it was how the whole process with creamtion and funerals is all an job and you can't really have emotions attached with your job. The whole time of the beginning of the book, the author ws in disabelief a little bit adjusting to everything while it was just a daily routine to the people around him. The whole death concept is a process the do's and don'ts. There is a price to everything we do. I feel like from the Curtains you get a better insight on people's actions and emotions on how they feel about deceased people. Neil the owner was saying that it was evolved and that the whole process of death is not what it used to be.

HW#48 - Family Perspectives on the Care of the Dead

1.)When you die, how would you like to happen to your body? Why?
2.)What was your first experience with death? How did you feel?
3.)Have you ever attended a funeral/awake? If so, how many?
4.)Do you believe in after life?
5.)How do you feel about the dominant social practices of the care of the dead in society today?

My Mom
1.) I want to be cremated because i don't like the thought of being so many feet under. I just rather be cremated where my family can see me everyday.

2.)Wow that a tough one, i would have to say my grandmother's you know Mita. I felt really sad. She was really sick but i didn't want her to die.

3.)Yes i've been to alot. At least 4 or 5

4.)I do but then again i don't.

5.)I think that everybody has their perpective of treating the dead. I think that all of the techniques are good and well-thoughtout. It's whatever satifies you.

My Aunt
1.)Im on the fence. I don't know if i want to be buried or cremated. I kind of don't want to think about it. Clark can make that decision for me when the time comes.

2.)Ive experienced a lot but the most memorable one was your grandfather's. He was very close to me. I felt kind of trapped by the fact that he was gone. I couldn't believe he died.

3.)Yea a couple i dont remeber exactly.

4.)Yes i very much do.

5.)I think that they are ok.

Talking to my mom about her views on death compared to my aunt were slightly different. Being that my aunt was older than her by at least 20 years, i thought maybe she would know how she was like her body to be like unlike my moms. It seems like she hasn't put much thought in her death as you thought someone would. While interviewing my mom she became very emotional, talking about this lead to my grandfather's death (her father) to how our whole family just split apart instead of becoming closer and stronger as one. They both didn't have much disagreement on the views of caring the dead by the fact they grew up the same way in a catholic religionist background. We grew up learning only one type way and not anything else so it's hard to switch our views to something else. For all typical hispanic backgrounds religion is a big part and most of the ceremonies are in spanish because that is our culture. My mom mentioned that she doesn't want anybody to cry but be happy and laughed. I feel like its a tough situation how can you have all smiles when the one you love is deceased? Would that be considered disrespectful? I feel like that is a hard place to say.

Hw#47 - Peer Perspectives on the Care of the Dead

Questions:

1.)When you die, how would you like to happen to your body? Why?
2.)What was your first experience with death? How did you feel?
3.)Have you ever attended a funeral/awake? If so, how many?
4.)When you're in that kind of environment, how does it make you feel?
5.)Do you believe in after life?
6.)How do you feel about the dominant social practices of the care of the dead in society today?

My Friend Dakota

1.)I personally want to be cremated. Just the thought of what happens beneathe the ground. I dont want to be buried. I would rather be cremated. I also dont want people crying. I want everybody to enjoy themselves.

2.)My uhm grandmother,i had seen other deaths but yea. I felt sad. i didnt understand. I didnt want her to be sick. We all are gonna have our time.

3.)Yes i have and multiple.

4.)It makes me feel sad because you reflect on the person's life and the moments you had with them.

5.)Im in the middle. I believe in it and then i dont. Im partial.

6.)I think its good.

My friend Lissy

1.)I honestly have mixed emotions right now. I dont want worms to eat me and i dont want to be burned to death.

2.)*awkward silence* My brother's death i used to day dream we could do things together. It didnt turn out that way. Everything is not how its planned.

3.)One awake, we all drank *laughs* sat around for hours. Shared funny moments.

4.)I feel sad and wish i wasnt there. *laughs*

5.)Yes,yes i do.

6.)i wish we didnt have them *laughs*

My Friend Kenny

1.)Question you never think about. Whatever easy on the family.

2.)I remeber them all. Probably my dad, started with my grandma. Each one is just important as the other. Part of your life. Grandparents are suppose to go first.

3.)Yes and about 6

4.)Uhm, well it makes you feel sad because there's a death in your life.

5.)Yes because you almost have to. Thats what you're living for. Its like you believe in Santa Claus till they tell you different same with afterlife.

6.)Whats the alternative? What else they gonna do with you? You dont wanna get zapped.

My Friend Kimberly

1.)I would like to be cremated. Not to sound stupid but because i hear when they bury you with w.e you have to steal it. And because i liked my family to feel that im still with them if they keep them or even take some ashes to places i've wanted to go.

2.)My uncle..when i i found out he killed himself. I was 7. My family told me he had a tummyache and then my aunt(who spills out all the drama) told me the truth..He was my favorite uncle. I couldnt stop talking about him. I wrote stories and stuff EVERY YEAR, the teachers had to have a meeting with my parents about it.

3.)Yea my uncles, some guy, this lady's, and my mom's aunt so 4 that i can remeber.

4.)To me it depends on the person. i went to funerals where everyone is joking around either because we didnt know them too well or because thats the only way we could take the pain away. And then i been to funerals where we just cried because that person meant so much to you. Its a scary environment because you're just imagining yourself in that coffin and wondering how people will react to you.

5.)I do but i dont. i think we all say "hes all in a better place now" because we all know they werent meant too be alive but then again where do they really go? Heaven or hell? who's the judge of that?

6.)I feel like, its the least they can do to bring everyone who loved the person all together to lrealize every moment in life is precious in their life being gone. They must do what they can before its their time, sometimes it scares me though. Like i cant look at them because it just me think of my uncle.

When my friend Dakota she didnt know either cremation or buried. I was kind of surprised looking back on it because everybody i spoke to or know have decided on how they want to be left when they die. Everybody i feel didnt know how to handle the questions very well. At one point one of them started to cry and i felt bad about it. It's a very hard topic to talk about let alone think about. You dont really want to think about your death situation until maybe till it happens. Interviewing people about this topic, i never realize how much of an impact it could have on you just as the interviewer. It makes you think a lot of about the who, what,where,when, etc on death. Is it really what it is all put out to be? Or are we living a dream?

Throughout this unit i hope to gain more insight on the caring of the death and see if any of my ideas change as well. i noticed also when i interviewed my friends, there were always these pauses and constant silence like they didnt know what to say or answer the question like they were scared or something. I found it kind of weird. I didnt think they were that bad.

HW#46 - Initial Thoughts on the Care of the Dead

When it comes to death i experienced a lot. Coming up from my family when someone dies in our family you should always pay your respects to that person. A majority of my family members who have passed away has always held an awake or some sort and most of them have been in Spanish. In the Hispanic culture they are very religionist based especially coming together with god and heaven. When my grandfather passed away, i remember so many people being there who i didn't even know you knew me which was the weird part. I feel like whenever someone in your family passes away, it brings all these people together who don't even know just for that one person. It feels kind of awkward and weird. Looking at him in the coffin was so unnatural just by the fact it wasn't "him". When i visited him in the hospital and saw his body there, it was completely different seeing him all dressed up.

I noticed many things throughout my life during the death experiences i had. Why is that people must always all black when attending a funeral home? Why is that particular color a "sign"? Another thing is that awakes last so many hours. Why spend so many hours looking a dead person if it's going to make you cry even more? Growing up i only heard of cremation and buried. I never really heard of other techniques being used for the dead unless in the perspective of a different country. A lot of people when they bury someone they day that they died, they tend too forget about them later on. Its as if only that die was the most important and the other days don't matter. Lot of dead people are often forgotten later on in life.

Looking at the birth unit and the care of the dead unit they are very simliar in some aspects by the fact they a re sensitive topics. When a woman is pregnant you are suppose to be sensitive towards her and gentle because of the fact she is having a baby. It is very sacred. With a dead person, you are very sympathetic by the fact someone has died to that person and to other people as well. Both are overwhelming topics. Hopefully throughout this unit i will be able to learn more other perspectives from other people as well as Andy.

HW#45 - Reply to Other Peoples' Comments

To Brandon,

It was understandable that you were unable to give me positive feedback since i didnt have enough information on the Indian Birth Rituals on my blog. Next time i will surely provied enough given information on my topic in order to do better commenting for you and other people.

To Younger Person,

I appreciate the fact that you understood my overasll point that Indian births are much different from American births and how they have different stages going about how their baby is born. As i said for Brandon i will write more on the blog to get a better insight from the birth rituals taken place in India.

HW#44 - Comments on Other People's Projects

Kristin
In Brazil, abortions are illegal compared to the United States it is legal to terminate the baby. In Brazil is is considered a sin and you shall be punished for committing such a crime as killing a baby.

The part that you talked about the 9 year old being raped by her step father then later having an abortion because her physical body was not ready to have a set of twins i thought was very intriguing and heart felt. She was very young and it is unheard to hear something like that happen in the U.S.

I believe that abortions should be opened to everybody not excluded from different countries especially Brazil. If people in the U.S can have them so do the woman in Brazil have the right way also. Its not a crime as the women being raped but more so the girl terminating the child.

Larche
Women who have infertility are treated differently from women who can conceived. They are rejected from others and considered the bad in the bunch basically and become excluded from others.

When you talked about the woman from Mumbai and how she was impacted by the fact she couldn't have children for 13 years. She was rejected a lot by others and her identity was based on how many children she had.

It makes me think about my future and if i wasn't able to conceive any kids and how it would effect me as a person. I wouldn't want to be in that position such as that woman and feel as if i lost myself. Nobody deserves that.

Willie
Lots of women after they have babies suffer from Post-Partum Depression because of the changing of the body or having negative thoughts. Women who suffer from this can sometimes cannot take care of their child and have mood swings.

It crazy that some women wouldn't even know if they are suffering from depression. They can have all these possible symptoms and they could possibly hurt themselves and their child from this sickness without even knowing.

I never heard of anyone suffering from post-partum depression. I feel like it shows another side of birth because you don't hear it often from people that they have been depressed from giving birth.

What are some statistics in the United States of women who suffer from this sickness? Does it vary from C-Sections from Natural birth? Or both? What causes it?

Michelle
During the pregnancy it seems that the male has the right to do everything rather than the woman giving birth but when the labor is in action it seems that the male/father is not present more so the mother(grandmother) and the female family members but then again it depends the gender role attitudes.

I like how you said not only do the women in the U.S prefer female doctors but so do women in India too. Both women know what they want or prefer. No matter where your from all the women seem to have the same stigma.

I thought that it related a lot to my project because i wanted to learn the birth culture in India as well. I feel like it's something different from what we hear everyday and good to hear other's people views on things we might not agree on as well.

Brandon
Being able to learn more in depth of being pregnant and having another human inside of you and the effects that it had on you. Being able to deal with the physical and emotional appearances.

I like how the how the last woman said "The most amazing thing you'll experience in life is seeing another human being born. It was such an emotional moment, one I will hold onto forever", i thought that that was very touching and a tear dropper.

It nice hearing other people's perspective of being pregnant. Hopefully when i have my child, i will have some of those good thoughts also being able to relate to them as well. You never can understand until it actually happens to you.

HW#42 - Pregnancy & birth culminating project

Ally and I looked up research on Indian Birth Rituals and found out the different techniques they use in the Hindu Culture. Also the different statistics involving religion to. Its very different from American culture. They go through a series of stages. Our posterboard is above showing some background information on the Indian Culture.

HW#41 - Independent Research

The benefits of having a hospital birth and how it is meant to be as comfortable as possible for the mother as well as the birth process more easy. They are able to have medical attention at all times at the same time privacy with their loved ones. The mothers are given medicine to ease the pain of the birth process. There are parental classes for the parent to be as well to know what to do. There are many traditional births provided.

http://kidshealth.org/parent/system/doctor/birth_centers_hospitals.html

Different births around the world very different from society today. It is very ritual and traditional. Some countries drink certain things or avoid contact with their body. This is uncalled in the U.S. Most births are in the hospitals in two ways natural or c-section. There are a lot of rules in every other country relating to the baby and the mother. They have to follow the rules of the country.

http://www.midwiferytoday.com/enews/enews0241.asp

There are more benefits on having home births than negativity. It leans more towards having birth at home than hospitals. Some of the benefits of home births are you can control the experience and there is no separation between the mother and the child. Some of the cons are complications and expenses such as insurance.

http://www.unhinderedliving.com/home.html

Looking at statistics, minorities have had more abortions compared to white people. As the years have gone by the abortion rates have gone down. It used to be a very high percent. It says that not all contraceptive use has not always been good. The basics of safe sex and how many woman have had abortions the first 12 weeks and the percentages.

http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/fb_induced_abortion.html

There are a lot of babies being in countries like Africa compared to Asia and Europe. The lowest one was Hong Kong with 7.37 babies. I thought the U.S would have a high percentage of birth rates and they were only 14.18. The highest number was 49.62 which was in Nigeria. I think depending where you live and economic status weights out the baby status. For example, compared to the U.S its nothing like Nigeria.

http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/peo_bir_rat-people-birth-rate

Looking at the research i collected, i might advertise how home births are better than hospital births and compared them to other births in other countries and see the benefits of both different birth experiences. I looked up different things because i wasnt exactly sure what i wanted to do for this project so i researched a little bit of everything. I think it would interesting to see how our lifestyle in the United States with the process of having a child comparing to other countries and see if it is actually beneficial to them and if we should try these techniques. Im going to look at the rates of other countries of their "home births" possible and our home births too. In our country it always seem home birth is the best option and everywhere else it seems like thats all they have no hospitals or nothing.

HW#40 - Insights from Book - Part 3

Hey- thanks for writing on the birth history and how it has come a long way since the ancient years. I found it very intriguing and enjoyed it as well. Your overall perpective of birth on how there were very dangerous procedures people did to give birth using different tools and methods epecially cesurans which me see a bigger picture on giving birth. I didnt know how severe it was to have a baby and it made me think twice about c-sections. In the last third of the book you focused on the father's perpective or place in birth,the aftermath of the birth and suming up the whole book.

1.) In other cultures, fathers have a specific role-one very simliar to the mother's. Page.210

2.)Throughout history, the immediate postpartum period has been as much as victim of fahsion and misconception as has labor and birth. Page 215

3.)Why does it seem most of the things talked about leads to death or something bad?

Given that aim, and your book, the best advice I would give for a 2nd edition of the text would be, more stories from real life people than just the history and interviews that could be taken place from others. But I don't want you to feel like I'm criticizing. I appreciate the immense amount of labor you dedicated to this important issue and particularly for making me think about c-sections and the process of labor and how are so many things that could happen & different techniques being used. In fact, I'm likely to do give natural birth rather than c-section differently as a result of your book." The author replies, "Thanks! Talking to you gives me hope about our future as a society!"

HW#39 - Insights from Book - Part 2

Cassidy, Tina. Birth. NY,NY: Grove Press, 2006. Print.

The book has taught me about Cesarean sections and where importantly a part of history where it became. It also was talking about how C-Sections are the safest procedures to have done when having babies. Just like the movie they talked about how lots of celebrities such as Posh had her babies to work around her husbands schedule and how they make it popular for everybody else. It was talking about how the some woman given drugs they didnt ask for and for unneccesary c-sections that did not need to happen and then end up killing their baby. Interesting aspects i found was when they were talking about taking the baby's limbs out onee by one i thought that it was sad and pretty gross it was called a craniotomy.(Pg.104) Another thing was how one doctor took out the reproductive glans of one patient and how they would just tear up their insides.(pg.113) One story that caught my eye was the woman with Cancer and she had lost a limb and they in the end she died and so did her child too. It said that she decided to have a c-section but later changed her mind and then the family ended up suing the hospital.(Pg.121) I liked the fact that they were talking about how a man by the name of William Smellie who taught men how to deliver babies. It was very strange, they didnt have no actual experience and they would dress up as woman in disguise.(pg.135) The unsusual labor positions. (pg.181) I researched c-sections vs.natural births and it was saying that risks are much higher for c-sections and can cause emotional damage as well as physical. Women with c-sections are more likely want to give birth again. There are much more risks with c-sections than natural birth. http://www.naturalbirthandbabycare.com/vaginal-birth.html

HW#38 - Insights from pregnancy & birth book - part 1

The book is organized in time periods. It starts out from ancient times to the 1900's. The author talks about a lot of different women in each time period relating to there birth story and how its changed over time. The major question that is being asked i believe is how our system of birth and pregnancy has evolved over a course of millions of years. From my point of view, i think that this is a interesting questiom because i was particularly wondering how women/other living things give birth compared in other places and time periods. The book has been very engaging so far and i enjoy it. The first 100 pages of the book was talking about the woman's body and how their pelvis are narrow and how painful it has been to give birth. It also talks about thw midwifery history and many famous women have helped with giving birth. I believe that midwives deserve a lot of recongition. Rather than using so much technology with birth i believe it should be natural. It true that we are possibly making the giving birth process worse instead of improving. She uses a lot of statistics about the birth epidemic and lot of historic facts.

Hw#37-Comments

Bianca, I enjoyed reading your post. I liked how you talked about the women's appearance and how they responded answering your questions. One part stood out to me when you talked about your mother about the pain she was having which brought her closer to you in the womb and her starting a new life with a new child. I like how you mention that having a child could possibly bring family together because I think that happens with my family often. We have kids and then we become closer as a whole and forget the other negativity in our life but focus on the baby. Keep up the good work, I look forward to reading more.

Abdul, Wow I thought all three of your stories were very touching. I enjoyed all of them. I like how each of them told a different story from different views within your family. I like how you talked about your mom having to raise a child all on her own. She is a strong woman. I thought it was funny when she said that she missed the attention she got when she was pregnant. In your second story I like how bascially it was the complete opposite and how both the mother and the father put both equal efforts which I believe how it should be. The mother shouldn't have to go through that alone. The third story about your aunt was intriguing I never heard a story like that before. Its unlikely you hear something like this often. I liked how you said "she made a full recovery and went out to successfully give birth 2 years after." That's is very tough but she was able to make it throught it.

Young Person (Jenny),
Leah,I thought your post was cool. I liked how you talked about your sister's birth compared to your birth. You can tell the differences your mom did from before to now. My favorite lines were when you said your mom "I was young and it was a learning experience". She was learning about her own pregnancy as everything was coming along. I didn't think about pregnancy before. It kind makes me want to know about my birth.

HW#36- Pregnancy & Birth Stories

Birth Story#1(My Birth): In my first pregnancy, i felt weird. i didn't know what to expect, it was my first time. I was young and it was a learning experience. During the pregnancy, i didn't appreciate it. I was young and naive. While i was pregnant, i didn't do anything. I was just running around and living my life. During the pregnancy, my family was very supportive and happy which made it easier. i didn't have any feelings or thoughts influencing me to have a baby. I didn't plan the pregnancy. When i think about your birth i get happy thoughts.

Hearing about my own birth story was kind of interesting especially hearing my mother's perspective of where she was in her life. I like how she said that when she thinks of my birth she get happy which makes me happy. I kind of felt a little on the down side because it was unexpected but at the same time a joyous moment. I was able to learn a what my mother's thoughts about being pregnant for the first time and how it isn't easy at all.

Birth Story#2(My Sister's Birth): During my second pregnancy, i was definitely in tune with myself because i was older. I read about pregnancies in books and i was more in tune with my body. I wanted to become close with my baby and read more into being pregnant. I was in more stable relationship and better place in my life. I could handle and it was better. Mt husband was very supportive. It was planned pregnancy. We wanted a child and that responsibility. I was happy and was at a good time in m life. It was everything i was wished for, i wouldn't change anything.

I thought it was intriguing hearing about my birth compared to my birth. My sister's was more organized and planned compared to mines. She was looking forward to my sister's birth and she looked into it. She was prepared for what was going to happen in 9 months. I like how she said she was had a stable relationship and better place in her life because it helps a lot with the pregnancy. It becomes stress-free and puts more attention into the baby rather than other relationship issues.

Birth Story#3: I had a lot of mood swings and the pain was almost unbearable. I drank when i shouldn't have because it took the pain away. In order to prepare for my daughter's birth, i didn't do anything. The fact that i had so much family in the hospital room made me feel comfortable but the fact the pain was really bad. I broke my mother's arm. At the age of 16, i had my first child, it was just a spar of the moment kind of thing. Now that i look back, i realized i didn't make the right decision. When i think of my daughter, i think of how beautiful she was and how happy i was.

This story reminds me a lot about my own birth and the same things that my mother went through. Lots of women go through their issues of being pregnant in different ways could be good or bad. Hearing that through her pregnancy she drank for the pain to go away was an eye-opener to me. I never heard of something like that before. This story by far was interesting and unexpected turn.

Why do most women when they are pregnant cope with pregnancy not so well?

HW#35 - Other Peoples' Perspectives 1

Yarelyn 17,

1.) What are you thoughts on abortion?
I don't think it's right unless it's for medical reasons.

2.)How would you feel if abortions was illegal?
I think it should be legal for medical reasons only with the exception, if abortion were illegal i would support it because it would prevent killing of babies over irresponsible reasons.

3.) How would you feel if you were unfertizlie?
I would hate it as female, i think the process of having children is the best part of ones life but if this were to happen, i would adopt.

4.) If you got raped, would you terminate or keep the baby?
That is such a hard question! I'm gunna have to say I'd keep it because it is still a life no matter how it was conceived.

Olivia 17,

1.) Should pregnant women be able to have sex with anybody?
I don't think they should. If they do, it may mess up the paternity of the baby.

2.) If you found out your baby was mentally ill, would you still keep it?
I would keep it. It's my baby so i have to raise it. It would really bother me but i gotta do what i gotta do.

3.) What is your opinion on teen pregnancy?
I think a couple should use protection always. If a teen couple plan to have sex then they should be ready for the responsibility of what can happen next.

4.) If you got raped, would you terminate or keep the baby?
Damn! uhmmmm i don't know. It's not the baby's fault, yet i can't really love the baby the way a mother should because the father raped me.

Kimberly 16,

1.) Do you believe some women who want a baby are desperate enough to have any man's baby?
I doubt they would want to have sex with just ANYONE but i believe that a woman who really wants a child would either adopt or take a guy's sperm.

2.) Do you think it's possible to hurt the baby while your pregnant?
I believe that it is possible to hurt the baby while your pregnant because your putting force while being on top or press on her tummy and you wouldn't know where in her stomach where the baby is at that moment.

3.) How do you feel about teen pregnancy?
I feel you can't support the child then you shouldn't have one, go to school finish your education. Then have a child whom you can support and lead a better life.

I noticed with every person i interviewed they said that they would keep the child if they were raped and not terminate. They all seemed hesitated to that question just by the fact, it's another life even if the way the baby was brought up was wrong. All the people that i spoke to especially from my generation know the basics about birth and believe that we should always use protection to prevent pregnancy. It seems they didn't know the background things on birth and pregnancy which is understandable by the fact we don't really learn about it as we should.

Not one person said that they would give up their child if they were teriminately ill which i was surprised even if it is your child because it would be an exception responsilbity. When i asked Olivia her face expression was funny because she didn't know whether if she should say yes to keep the child or no because you know you don't want to say the wrong thing. Then you would seem as if you have no feelings which is not the case at all. I can though with these three people would make smart decisions when they do decide to have a child.

Hw#34-Some Thoughts on Birth

When it comes to birth, I always wanted to know how much the initial pain is and how it actually feels to carry another human being inside of you. Do you actually feel it? Some may call it beautiful things while other may not. Honestly I don't know much about birth just by the fact that I've seen my sister's birth and that you have to wait 9 months to conceive. Lots of times I feel like the "having the baby" is close to never intentional. It just happens and the soon to be parents just accept it or reject it.When I asked my mom about myself, she didn't mean for me to happen but she wasn't upset by the fact she got pregnant. Just bring up a new life to the family. I noticed a lot when a birth of baby coming lots of the focus is taken off maybe other siblings and kids to put on the "baby" that isn't even here yet.

Also the soon to be mother, is treated as an sacred thing and is like untouchable. In my culture, there is always the traditional baby shower with the well and the huge chair which I still till this day do not understand and the hat with baby things on them. One thing i am curious to know is how giving birth has changed over the years. Nowadays is it more safer by the fact we have all these medications to ease the pain for the mother and different tools to make the baby come out. Is really "natural" or just a word to cover it? I wonder what it is like in different countries and how they percieve birth in a different ways that americans do. What are their outtakes on things?

HW#32- Final Comments on Illness & Dying

For Michelle,
I liked how each paragraph addressed every question that was given. Your first paragraph caught my attention the most because i feel the same way. The first sentence "The most nightmarish practice in our culture I found was the fact that insurance companies can choose not to accept you due to a prior ailment; at first this seems so insignificant." I thought that that was very insightful and interesting especially to start out the sentence. I feel like i can relate to your blog to my own experiences and how we witness and take in death/illnesses.

For Raven,
I like how said that we don't treat the sickness/dying people the same because they are their sickness just like Michelle had said. I agree because i know with personal experience, i have done that in the past with my sick family members. Maybe ill try it differently this time. My favorite part was when you said "We should not pity people for having an illness, neither should we reject them because they are different, but instead we should treat them as our equal because they are just like us, human." The nursing homes was something that came unexpected to me as you mentioned.

Hw#32-Final Thoughts

Looking at the movie comparing health care in the US compared to Canada and Europe was very shocking. You would think with all the advantages and thngs that the US has we would have good health care for everybody and that is not the case at all. People die everyday because they either don't qualify for health care for some "unrealistic" reason which is unfair. People in Britain are guarteened health care no matter what and without paying a cent most of the time. Unlike the US people treat each other as family rather than everybody for themselves. Money makes the world go round.

One of the most nightmarish about our social practices is that we as people take in so many medications and put so much chemicals in our body. Can we wonder if it's really helping us? It's not it's just slowing our deaths. Another are nursing homes and hospitals allows people to be isolated from the rest of the world keeping them attached to their own sickness. I think that when people stay in hospitals and nursing homes it makes them kind of more sick because its the same routine everyday not allowed to get a chance to interact with everything else.

After this unit, I might try using more of a spirtual healing instead of the typical medication and pills. I never actually tried meditation because I don't think it works but I might give it try not saying it's a 100% accurate but something different.

Looking at the food unit it connects alot to illness/dying. In today's society, lots of people make horrible food choice and on top of that we don't know where our food comes from which affects a lot how our body reacts to things and can make us sick. Then on top of that we get diseases such as diabetes etc, some get treated and some don't. So where does that leave us? I feel like it's our faults for this but at the same time the government for what they are putting out there in the world. There is something evil always happening behind closed doors that we don't know as a whole.

HW 31 - Comments 3

Brandon,

I thought your elevator speech was very engaging. I liked how you said that every time you saw the old man he was like a fish in a fish bowl constantly going up and down the hallway. It was kind of funny in a way at the same time kind of weird and disturbing. You mentioned that all the people there was all fish stuck in that bowl with no place to go at all. I never really thought of it like that. They all are stuck in a world within a inside world.

Jessica,

Your elevator speech was very intriguing. I wasn't expecting you to create a vivid picture for us about the human heart at all. It was interesting and once again unexpected. I liked that fact yiou gave out the papers about the human heart and the details. There was one part you said that imagine you wake in a place where you dont know, i could actually picture myself if that happened to me. Your elevator speech was different from everybody's elses. Good Job!

Hw#30-Comments

Raven,
Your opening sentence was a good grabber. I can relate alot to your post because i know a lot of people who had diabetes which made me more engaged in the post. I liked how you referred back to your own family history to what you want to do in the future to prevent yourself from getting diabetes. One thing that stood out to me was when you said "When people are diagnosed with an illness their illness becomes them", i thought that was very bold. People become their illness, i never thought of it like that. Overall your post was enjoyable and keep posting!

Michelle,
I thought your blog was very interesting. I like the part where you discussed we as a total don't know what happens behind closed doors in the nursing homes. I like that fact that you kept trying to get deeper and deeper insight on why they would allow to go there, i thought that was cool. I never knew that actually 30% of the ederly and the sick get abused so much. I find that to be very scary and hurtful towards them. Your post was nice to read and i also enjoyed the recording we heard in your elevator speech.
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For Me,
Raven
I really enjoyed reading your blog because it was an interesting account of patients in the nursing home. It is true that most patients don’t get enough visitors and I could never imagine being lonely in a nursing home without getting visits from my family and friends. It is also true that we would rather leave someone in the care of a stranger rather than actually taking care of the person yourself. I know that it may be difficult to decide whether to leave a family member in a nursing home but at the end of the day I will probably decide to take care of that family member the same way they took care of me time, and time again. I really enjoyed reading your blog.

HW 30 - Illness & Dying - Culminating Experiential Project

My classmates and I decided to go to a nursing home to see what life there was like. The nursing home is Mary Manning Walsh on 72 Street. When we first go there, it reminded me when i went to go visit my great-aunt. It looks like a regular building maybe to make the elderly feel "comfortable" as if they are living normally but there aren't. Both nursing homes were very simliar. The fact that it looked like they had own their own apartment and go about their business any other day as if it wasn't a nursing home. It was as if the nurses weren't there and they only responded when assisstance was needed. Like as if, the old people live like did 20 years ago.

As we you go up more floors that "homing" feeling began to go away. We all looked at each other like "what the hell?". It smelled digusting. There was the smell of urine and all kinds of medications. Most of the patients look like they didn't enjoy being there and seemed depressed compared to all the pictures on the walls as walked. Lots of them where in wheelchairs and honestly i think they would probably want to die in their own home than be here. Why stick a whole bunch of depressed lifeless people in one building and make more sad, it just doesn't seem right.

It's funny because in cartoons and things, old people seem grumpy and don't ever want to talk to people because they are alone. The majority of the people there, you could tell do not get enough vistors. We talked to a two elderly people and it looked like they were enjoying the company. It was like a warm feeling inside they had which made me feel good as well. Going there kind of made think that i don't want to end up there or any of my family members because it's just not a good feeling. I want to be able to take care of my family especially my mom and dad till their very last day. It's easy to give the responsiblitiy to a stranger who gets paid to take care of old people.

I was reading an article and it talked about how the nurses don't really get to know that patients very well because they are always rotating.

Visitor: How’s my father doing today?
Aide: Which one is your father?

Or:
Visitor: Is my mother’s appetite better today?
Aide: I’m not sure; I wasn’t here yesterday.

Or:
Visitor: How’s my aunt getting along with her new roommate?
Aide: I’m sorry, I don’t know. I usually work on the third floor.

The nurses do not establish a relationship with their patients because there isn't enough of them. Its like a revolving door. It's always someone new each day. I wouldn't want someone taking care of my loved one and know nothing about them. I think these are the few reasons why dying/ill feel the way they do. "Nearly 43 percent of nursing homes have signed on to the Advancing Excellence in America’s Nursing Home campaign, which began four years ago. Yet Dr. Mary Jane Koren, the geriatrician who is leading the campaign, estimates that only a quarter of homes practice consistent assignment on weekdays and perhaps only 10 percent for all shifts on all days." They should be able to have that "homing" feeling while they are "guests" just as people do in hotels.

http://newoldage.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/12/13/getting-to-know-you/?ref=nursinghomes

HW#29 - Reading and noting basic materials

The process of dying and illnesses has many parts to it and how it's seen differently no matter where you go. The book i read My Brother by Jamaica Kincaid discussed the issues of her brother having AIDS and nobody caring about you and not getting the proper service/care that you need to stay well coming from the island of Antigua. Especially how she didn't know how to cope with her feelings. In the book it said "My friend Bud said to me her found it strange the way people in Antigua regard illness, that when a person is ill no one mentions it, no one pays a visit; but if the person should die, there is a big outpouring of people at the funeral"(page 146). Nobody there understand how to deal with people with AIDS who are dying and believe they should stick to themselves because they are healthy. Jamaica Kincaid didn't know whether to be sympathetic to the whole situation or move on with her life. Some people have resistance to dying people while other are the exact opposite.

We had a guest speaker who talked about her husband who passed away, the struggles that she had and different aspects that she chose to cope with everything that was going on. Beth dealt with her husband's terminal illness by always being right by his side no matter what. It didn't matter the place or time. She said that they didn't have to be talking, that she could be silent with him and that's all that matter. Just the fact that she was in his presence is what made their relationship very special. Her husband wasn't being isolated but instead rewarded with the other people's company such as his wife and family.

When people have become terminal sick they become isolated from the world and other people. In the documentary, Near Death the doctors and the nurses to do not have any physical or emotional attachment to the patients just like in the book "My Brother." In the movie it was as if they weren't a part of the human world anymore but this sick world. The patients were very abandoned and alone to just lay there and die. It's like two completely different worlds. If you are on the verge of dying, why would they treat you? When this happens there nothing really much to do but to give you the little treatment you need to slow your death because there is nothing you can do to make things better.

Just like hospitals, nursing homes do the same thing. They take these older people with other older people and stick them in one place where they all feel the same depressed, sick, and old. They probably don't recieve much companies from others so they live their life to whatever they can. That's probably why most old people enjoy young fresh company. In stigma it said "the term stigma, then, will be used to refer to an attributr that is deeply discrediting, but should be seen that a language of relationships, not attributes, is really needed. An attributer stigmatizes opne type of possesor can confirm the usualness of another and therefore is neither creditable as a thing itself". It's kind of like you being judged by what you have like your disease etc. By that sickness you are premantenly put somewhere with your own kind. You are always reminded that yiou are a part of that "stigma".

Hw#28-Comments 2

For Raven,
The best part of what you wrote that i liked is when you compared a person who worked in meat market compared to a person who works in a mattress store and the disadvantages the person had. I thought that was very interesting. Another thing was how you had an opening sentence to introduce what we were about to read. "When someone is diagnosed with an illness their main priority consists of them taking medicine and other treatments to keep the illness down."I thought that it was a good attention grabber especially about sickness and dying. :)

For Michelle,
The lines "So their view on life is different than a healthy person’s because they just wish they were normal healthy person and instead worry how long will I live? then about what to wear to a party", i thought that it was very insightful comparing healthy people and people who have been sick all their live just trying to make it by in life. I also like how you compared your friend's sickness to how your mother said that you should "I should be thankful to God for being born a healthy baby unlike some other unlucky kids" my mom says the same thing to me all the time. The ending sentence i thought was clever and good cut-off. :)

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Younger Reader

When it come to people that are close to you in your life, family or friends, you should always take full advantage of that relationship and build on it because you never know when you might loose someone. In terms of taking advantage i don't mean taking for granted. Whether someone is in your life for a long period of time or a short one, the time period is not what counts, its the type of relationship that come out of it.

Partners

Michelle
Leah,
The line i enjoyed reading was, " She still the happy grandma that she was when i was child and i'm glad she is still there." Because it shows something we all do we remember the person in their prime not when their frail and lying on the couch, we'd rather remember when the person was healthy. Also found myself nodding my head to this, " No matter what is going on, you should make sure you have time for those love ones especially the sick and dying ones like she did with her husband." Something many people can resonate with because we don't make this priority instead our school or job, technology distract us and not every stop to smell the roses. To just stop for a minute and just spend time and will be better way to spend your time to its full.

Larche

I liked the line "Looking back i feel bad that i don't visit her as much as should because one day something can happen to her and i can't tell her what i wanted." because it showed me that you didn't want to have any regrets about the relationship you have with your grandmother. That you didn't want to disconnect yourself from her as she's with Alzheimer's. That you want to cherish every moment you have left with her which is important to you because life is not guaranteed to anyone.

HW#27 - Visiting an unwell person

Over the break, I visited my grandmother who has Alzheimers. I haven't seen her in a long time so it was weird seeing her after a couple years. When i walked into the house she was laying on the bed not doing much. She was watching television, pretty much relaxing. My dad had told me previously that she had been in and out the hospital. When i saw, i felt like she kind of looked the same when i saw her about 8 years ago just a little lifeless. She had been sick for a long time, i think she just adjusted to the situation. Also being that she is old. When i walked into the room she didn't remeber what my name was and who i was. I guess it being so many years or because she had the disease.

She wasn't really talking to me. I had to speak in spanish but that wasn't really helping neither. I was making small talk here and there. I was looking at her body and she was very skinny and looked very frail. She seemed to just deal with the fact that she is sick because she can't do anything about it. She still the happy grandma that she was when i was child and i'm glad she is still there. She smiled a few times when i was talking like she was happy. Looking back on the book, to seeing my grandma i will always love her, i don't understand in the story she didn't feel the same. Just cause you don't see somebody for a long period time doesn't mean you should forget about them. I think she wanted to let go what she had left on the islands but to me honestly i can't let go my own family.

Looking back i feel bad that i don't visit her as much as should because one day something can happen to her and i can't tell her what i wanted. I made sure that i got everything out before i left her. I took back to what Beth had said that "time is important". No matter what is going on, you should make sure you have time for those love ones especially the sick and dying ones like she did with her husband. I thought that was important aspect.

HW#26 - Looking back & forward in unit

1.) What really goes on behind closed doors of health care
2.) How differently the health care is in America, Canada, and Europe. America seems the most money hungry of them all.
3.)Just cause you have health care doesn't mean you always benefit from everything.
4.)I learned from the perpective of love one dying and how it was different to how i saw views of illness and dying.

The first movie we saw about how the health care was really intriguing. I didn't really know about the health care situation till actually seeing what other people go through and how it all started. I thought it was very interesting how the doctors in Europe just automatically did their job without getting paid upfront as they do in America and just simply help the ill people because it's their job not just for the money. In America people are just so money hungry and greedy not caring about anybody else and their problem which is the problem.

Another source that was very helpful was when the lady came in to talk about her husband who had pasted away. It settled well with me because you were able to hear the story of how he started off to his last breathe which was interesting. She talked about talking to a Buddha and doing different techniques to not try and save him but keeping those positive thoughts. Not a lot of people i know go to visit buddhas but talk to a priest or say prayers most often. It was something different i never heard before.

In the book that i read, My Brother by Jamaica Kincaid, I learned that not everybody is going to be there for you even if you are sick and everybody won't love you just cause your family. Where Jamaica grew up and where her brother was living if you got AIDS you were automatically forgotten as if you had died already. I thought that that was pretty harsh and just selfish on their part. Also the author didn't really know how she felt about her brother's death. One day she wouldn't know if she loved him and the next day, she didn't know how to feel. I found it very confusing but also that not everybody thinks the same way we should typically feel or say.